Why my out of date, used, bulky, no longer in production mp3 player is superior to your stylish iPod.

Why my out of date, used, bulky, no longer in production mp3 player is superior to your stylish iPod.
As i spent hours with my girlfriend yesterday attempting to switch her iPod from her desktop to her laptop - and eventually failing miserably resulting in a broken Apple product - i realized something; iPods suck.

Last month i made one of the greatest purchases of my short life. I bought a Creative Zen mp3 player from eBay. Today, I am here to explain to you why this product is a step above the iPod which, as my survey says, 96.4% of you own.

1. AWE INSPIRING POWER
You know a product demands respect when it take a full breath of air just to state it's name. THE FORTY GIGABYTE CREATIVE ZEN NOMAD JUKEBOX XTRA.

2. MORE MONEY FOR BOTTLED WATER
At $80, I dare you to find another mp3 player or even a portable hard drive with 40 GB - including on eBay.

3. YOU PAID MONEY TO KEEP IT FROM SCRATCHING?
Even though I bought it used, it came with all the accesories that were standard when it was for sale in stores. Including: An AC wall charger, a leather carrying case with belt clip, and an industry-standard USB cable; meaning I can use the same cable for my mp3 player, PDA and digital camera. What comes with your iPod? That's right, NOTHING.

4. IDIOT PROOF DESIGN
Like all electronics this device is prone to crashes and freezes. What ever do I do when this occurs, you ask? I pop off the front cover, take out the battery and put it back in. Oh that's right, your iPod can't be opened by you and it must be sent in just to replace the battery or hard drive. (By the way my player can hold a 20, 30, 40, and 60 GB harddrive and I can replace it myself)

5. BACK IT UP
Seeing as how the creator of my music device is not obsessed with the fact that sharing music is evil, I can hook it up to any computer with only a quick driver download to ensure full compatibility. This means I can transfer data or music without forcing my player into disk mode.

What does all this mean? It means you were ripped off and bought a product you thought was one-of-a-kind. Sorry. Next time, do some research. Watching TV does not count.

Now, I'm sure some of you are saying, I'm perfectly happy with my iPod and shame on you for your blasphemy. We're all entitled to our opinions. Mine, however, is the correct one.

What happened to horror?

I have been a lover of good horror flicks for quite some time. I love the excitement of sitting in the dark and having an unexpected jolt rattle my brain. Lately, the horror genre has changed. It has become cliche by replacing the thrills and chills with blood and guts.

Now don't get me wrong, I love to see limbs torn off and spleens devoured in a cannabalistic frenzy but put those things by themselves and it simply isn't scary. Current filmakers need to memorize these formulas:

Blood + Guts = BORING. Blood + Guts + Paranoia + Terror = AMAZING.

Movies like Saw, Saw II, and Hostel have proven to be immensly popular hits among this generation's horror fanatics. I, however, see nothing but empty plots that try to fill the void with as much carnage as possible. Horror isn't suppose to turn your stomach inside out, it's supposed slowly creep into your brain and reveal itself as a winged demon of the night when you least expect it.

Let's take the new thriller, The Descent. This is one of the best horror films I have ever seen. Period. It doesn't jump into the horror and blood like one would suspect; it slowly builds up the terror so when the monsters finally are revealed, you are sweaty, paranoid and ready to jump out of your seat.

Critics hailed The Descent as "The best thriller since Alien." Holy shit, has it really taken 27 years to come up with a movie enjoyed by critics and moviegoers alike?

I hope this means the times are a-changin'. I'm keeping my fingers crossed.